Guest post: 5-2 diet diary

This is another guest post from Roger

Last month was the x:7-x diet, where x is supposed to be 2.

I have done this for some time in the past and found that it suits me and has the desired gentle effect.

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There is some hocus-pocus surrounding this diet that involves ketosis, but it may be simpler to observe that if you grossly undereat for 2 days, you may well not catch up in the other 5 – I’m fairly sure this is true in my case. So often at the end of an under-eat day, one says “Ha! Tomorrow is bacon sandwiches and beer”, but it doesn’t actually happen. So I think it works by driving down aggregate calorie intake. Remember, as a result of the SSSS diet (see last month) our intake is already reduced by 10% by virtue of smaller crockery.

I have devised an objective scoring scheme for diets with which you will be familiar, so we can now judge the 5:2 diet. During this month I came to enjoy the cleansing effect of no-eat days – you can put up with anything for a day.

If you believe the [upgraded] weighing machine in my bathroom (which nobody in their right mind would) I lost about 0lb in 4 weeks (and gained 0). this is faintly disappointing as I would expect about 0.5lb/week, but it’s OK as a result. Ergo, I score it at 8 for tolerability and 2 for effectiveness.

The scores to date:

Month Regime T E M, α=0.5 M, α=1 M, α=1.5
January Low carb 3 8 7 11 15
February Slow carb 1 0 1 1 1
March SSSS 8 5 10.5 13 16.5
April 5-2 8 2 9 10 11
May Astronaut 11

Next month we will subsist on astronaut food, which it is difficult to look forward to. My diet1 promises to be much better.

More anon.

1. Dieting without tears or willpower, Roger Boyle, Y Lolfa, forthcoming 2018. Dr Boyle exhibits a dietary regime that does not alter what you eat, or when you eat it. Likewise what you drink and smoke. The results are astounding. Testimonials: “Roger is my Hero”, H Dee; “He treats food as bathos, and drink with antistrophe.” L Blissett.


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